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Oh I can speak to this one — I lived in Fez for almost two years so I ate in a lot of homes there. The thing that takes most people by surprise is the hand thing. You eat with your right hand, always. The left hand is considered unclean and using it at the table — even just to pass the bread — is noticed. It’s one of those things nobody will say anything about directly, they’re far too polite, but it matters.
The bread, called khobz, is used as a kind of utensil. You tear it and use it to scoop up the tagine or whatever’s in the shared dish. There are rarely individual plates in a traditional home — everyone eats from the same big dish in the center of the table, and you eat from the section directly in front of you, not from across the dish.
If you’re invited into someone’s home, expect the host to keep loading your side of the dish with the best pieces of meat or the choicest vegetables. The polite thing is to eat it, not resist. Refusing food that’s offered repeatedly is genuinely rude. Say “bismillah” before you start eating — even if you’re not Muslim, it’s appreciated as a sign of respect.
Oh and tea. The mint tea is a ritual, not just a drink. It’ll be poured from a height to create foam and you’ll be offered several glasses. Declining the first glass is considered acceptable but refusing all of it can feel like a snub. Just drink the tea, it’s amazing anyway.
Oh I loved Japan for this — the food culture there is unlike anywhere else I’ve been. So from my experience spending three weeks across Tokyo, Kyoto, and Osaka: the biggest thing that surprised me was that slurping your noodles is genuinely appreciated. Not just tolerated — actively seen as a sign that you’re enjoying your meal. I felt so liberated doing it after a lifetime of being told not to.
The thing that tripped me up at first was the tipping situation. I left a few coins on the table at a ramen place and the staff came running after me to return them. It’s not just unnecessary, it can actually come across as a bit insulting, like you’re treating them as charity cases. Once you get used to it you realise service is just built into the culture there.
For chopsticks: never stick them upright into your rice. It looks exactly like the incense sticks placed in bowls of sand at funerals and people find it deeply uncomfortable. Similarly, don’t pass food chopstick to chopstick — again, funeral associations. Just put it on someone’s plate directly.
Before eating, the phrase is “itadakimasu” — it means something like “I humbly receive” and it’s said before every meal. And when you finish, “gochisousama deshita.” Nobody expects a foreigner to know this but if you try it, people absolutely light up. I had a whole restaurant clap for me once at a tiny place in Kyoto when I got it right.
One more thing: if someone pours you a drink, don’t pour your own refill. You pour for others and let others pour for you. It sounds fussy but it becomes second nature after the first dinner.
